habits of a happy brain – loretta graziano breuning
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Dopamine produces the joy of finding things that meet your needs—the “Eureka! I got it!” feeling.
Endorphin produces oblivion that masks pain—often called euphoria.
Oxytocin produces the feeling of being safe with others—now called bonding.
Serotonin produces the feeling of being respected by others—pride.
[…]
Dopamine: the joy of finding what you seek Endorphin: the oblivion that masks pain Oxytocin: the comfort of social alliances Serotonin: the security of social importance
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Why It’s Difficult to Break Old Habits
I learned about the quirkiness of habits from a hypnotist who helps people quit smoking.
He told me to imagine a fourteen-year-old boy at a party. The boy sees a girl he wants to talk to, but he’s afraid. He tries a cigarette to steady his nerves, and it works! The girl returns his affection, and his happy chemicals flow. The reward is huge because it’s so relevant to “reproductive success.” The neurochemical spurt creates a huge link to his mammal brain that says: Cigarettes promote survival. Of course, the boy doesn’t think this in words, but the next time he needs confidence in the face of a “survival challenge,” his brain lights up the idea of smoking. With each cigarette, the pathway builds. Years later, when he tries to quit smoking, the insecurity of the fourteen-year-old boy at a party surges up because it has nowhere to go without the cigarette pathway. His inner mammal feels like he’s threatening his own survival when he resists the urge for a smoke. He must build a new happy habit in order to live without the old one.
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Make a Commitment to One Pathway at First
With so many choices and so many neurons, you can build a lot of new pathways to your happy chemicals. But you only have a limited amount of time and energy. If you spread it everywhere, a new road may not get built. So choose one remodeling project to start with. Commit to repeating it for forty-five days whether or not you feel like it. If you miss a day, start over with Day One.
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FOCUS ON YOURSELF
You cannot make yourself responsible for other people’s suffering, and you cannot make other people responsible for your suffering. Other people get to manage their happy chemicals with the circuits they’ve got, and you get to manage your happy chemicals with the circuits you’ve got.
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CONSIDER THIS
When things do go wrong, ask yourself whether you could have prevented it by being unhappy.
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KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
When your happy chemicals droop, it feels like something is wrong with the world. It helps to know that your happy chemicals are meant to go up and down so you can focus on your next step toward happy chemicals instead of on the flaws of the world.
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But I learned that I was not the captain of her ship. I could only be the captain of my own.
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pentru zilele cand sufletul sufera de vreo o raceala si am nevoie de remindere si [+]…
(mi-a placut tare mult “Your soul catches a cold.” din citatele anterioare, iar [+] va fi pentru lecturile in paralel, de mindfuleness, gratitude, psiho, ikigai, kaizen, si ce-oi mai gasi de bine si pozitiv)
Impresie. Albastru inefabil... 